Dating Tips & Relationship Advice for Women

Break These Five Dating Rules, and You Will Have Problems

Friday, July 3rd, 2009 | Dating Advice | No Comments

No one said Dating was easy, but if you follow these five rules and you’ll enjoy a richer date experience.

When it comes to your dating love life, do you wish there was a rulebook? While The Rules are so last century, a new dating handbook has yet to be created in the new era.

So how do you know the dos and don’ts rules of dating? The truth is there are no hard and fast rules, but the following guidelines should help you navigate the terrain known as your dating romance.

Rule #1: Listen to Your Feelings. Whether you’re on a date, communicating with someone you meet online, or flirting with a cutie you meet in the flesh, it’s important to pay attention and listen to your gut. If a potential date’s actions or words set off an internal alarm system, you owe it to yourself to pay attention and do act accordingly. These alarms can be both good and occasionally bad. For example, if you’ve met someone online and they seem interesting, then you talk to them on the phone and they sound completely different (in a negative way), you may decide not to meet them face to face. A positive example would be if you were on a date with someone and they seemed very nervous but well intentioned, your gut might tell you to give them a second chance. By going on a second date, you’ll gain a better understanding of whom they really are and if you’d like to see them on another date.

Rule #2: Pay Attention to the Red Flags. Like those internal alarms that alert you to your gut feelings, you also have an alarm system to alert you to the red flags. Often this alarm system is turned way down. As a result, we often ignore red flags and find ourselves getting involved with inappropriate partners because we’re not paying close attention. To become a truly successful single in the new millennium, you owe it to yourself to become a red flag observer. That means paying attention to red flags as they are presented to you on your dates. An example of a red flag would be if you found yourself on a date with someone who could not stop talking about their ex spouse. They may be a fantastic person, and eventually make a great partner, but right now they’re still not ready. Your job is to pay attention to that red flag and not pursue this person.

Rule #3: Actions Speak Louder Than Most Words. During the course of your Dating life you will most likely find yourself on a date with someone whose actions speak much clearer than his or her words. Maybe they’re attentive and chivalrous to you, but treat the waiter, bartender, and/or valet terribly. Or maybe they will claim they’re ready for a long-term relationship, but their wandering eye tells you otherwise. To get the best out of your dating life, it’s important to understand that actions speak louder than words. When someone’s actions are contrary to his or her words, this is not only a red flag alert, it’s gut-check time. By paying attention and screening out potential partners whose actions don’t match their words, you cut down on wasted dating and make it that so much easier to attract potential partners worth your time and energy.

Rule #4: Don’t Play Those Old Dating Games. Successful singles know what goes around may come around. They also know the importance of being honest and well intentioned with all the people they date. As a successful single, you owe it to yourself and the individuals you date not to play well-worn games. Be sure to call when you say you’re going to call. Do what you say you’re going to do, and be brutally honest when the other person asks if you’d like to go out again. If you don’t want to see them again, say so in a very kind and considerate way. By being honest and letting them down easy, you are not playing games. Expect the same consideration in return. If you don’t get it, don’t play games by taking that out on the next person you are dating.

Rule #5: Know When to Just Say “Game Over”. Just as you should not play those dating games, you will want to avoid getting played. Like it or not, there really are plenty of players on the dating scene. It’s up to you to know the signs of the player, know their game, and be confident enough to say “game over now.” Here’s how to really spot a player: When they approach, they’ll take you off guard with some backhanded compliment or insult along the lines of “you’re too cute to be wearing that” or “I’d buy you a drink, but you probably wouldn’t talk to me.” These tactics are actually known as The Game. The player’s motive is to take you off guard so that you’re on the defensive and try to make up for it by engaging them in their game. The problem is, these players aren’t very genuine. Instead of falling for their tactics, simply smile, say “game over,” and walk (better yet, run!) far.

While there are no hard and fast Dating rules, there are definitely real guidelines to follow to make your dating life more enjoyable. By always listening to your gut, paying attention to red flags, and understanding that actions speak louder than words, you cut down on wasted dating time. In doing so, you not only avoid getting played, but you also greatly increase your chances of dating relationship success.

Keep Your Man’s Dating Fires Burning

Friday, July 3rd, 2009 | Dating and Relationship Advice for Women | No Comments

While it’s important to know how to light a man’s fire, it’s also important to understand what douses his Dating fires.

In our quest to find, attract, and keep our perfect partner, we often wonder what turns men on. And while it’s important to know how to light a man’s fire, it’s equally important to understand what will douse his dating flames. By being clear about what kind of behavior turns men off, we can be better prepared to keep the sparks burning from our first encounter to happily ever after. What follows is a list of the top five male turnoffs.

Turnoff #1: Flaky Actions. Guys say that one of the biggest turnoffs when Dating a woman is when she either can’t commit to plans or constantly flakes on plans. If you regularly pencil in your plans with a “maybe” and/or cancel plans at the last minute, you’re giving your guy the impression that he’s very tentative in your life, aka “just good enough for now.” Who wants to date someone who makes them feel short term? Chances are you don’t, and you shouldn’t be the women who makes her date feel that way too.

Turnoff #2: Very poor communication skills. Raise your hand if you’ve been this lady in your relationship past: your date/boyfriend said or did something you didn’t like, but instead of saying anything, you went along with it. You may have even said it was “OK.” But, at some point down the road, you got upset. Maybe you even kind of blew up at an inappropriate time, causing an argument that completely took your significant other off guard. Most of us have been guilty of passive aggressive behavior at least once in our former dating past. It can happen. But when you repeat that kind of behavior in any dating/relationship scenario, the only thing you’ll succeed at is sabotaging your efforts. Just as you deserve to be with someone who’s very comfortable communicating his wants, needs, and desires, you, too, should be a healthy communicator. Don’t say one thing if you mean another. Instead, get in the habit of saying what you really mean. Guys will appreciate that!

Turnoff #3: Not always playing fair. From your initial encounter of your first date and beyond, guys pay attention to whether or not you’re playing fair. If, for example, you always expect the guy to come to your side of town, pick you up, open your door, pay the check, drop you off, call you the next day, and in general placate your every need without you so much as lifting a finger, you’re not really dating fairly. More important, if there’s a disagreement and you don’t fight fairly, i.e., you throw things in his face, hold grudges, and insist on winning every argument, you’re going to be a very lonely single girl because you’re not really being fair. In the new millennium, chivalry goes two ways and the dating game requires plenty of give-and-take. If you can be fair in dating times both good and bad, guys will dig you so very much!

Turnoff #4: Trying to change him over and over. It’s almost cliché how often in the media we see, hear, or read about a woman who tries to change her date. Whether it’s changing how he dresses, what he watches on TV, his manners, or his friends, the woman at the helm of all this change usually comes off as a control freak. Don’t be that girlfriend. Just as the guy in your life should accept you warts and all, you, too, should accept him for what he is. And if you maybe can’t? Don’t date him. It’s as easy as that. The whole point of being single and dating is to meet a variety of different people, find out who you are as well as who your perfect partner might be, and eventually settle down with the man who’s right for you. Rather than trying to change the wrong guy into Mr. Right, why not keep playing the field until you meet that special someone who’s far from perfect but whose imperfections you have no real desire to change? (He’s really out there — keep looking!)

Turnoff #5: Those ultimatums. Nothing turns a man off more than a lady who gives him an ultimatum. Not only are they not sexy, they’re usually ineffective. Healthy and happy relationships don’t need ultimatums. When you’re regularly communicating your needs to the person you’re in a relationship with, ultimatums are not really necessary. It’s when communication breaks down, when one person feels his or her needs aren’t being met, or when the relationship isn’t going in the direction one had hoped or at the speed one had anticipated, that ultimatums are sometimes issued. A huge turn-off, ultimatums are a nasty relationship tactic and should be avoided at all costs.

There you have it — the top male turnoffs. By understanding the Dating and mating behaviors that will shut men down, you ultimately master the art of how to always turn the right guy on. Best of luck and happy dating!

How To Flirt And Attract Men Like Crazy

Thursday, July 2nd, 2009 | Natural and Lasting Attraction | No Comments

I have always enjoyed engaging in flirting. It’s all fun and games until that ring is around your finger. Where would we be without Flirting? From the first time that I met my husband, I’ve been an expert in flirting. To know how to flirt men you have to be confident, easy going, and witty. Now I am not talking about the one liners guys like to drop. You must be feeling tired, since you have been running in my mind the whole day. Seriously? Successful flirting takes practice but is well worth the effort.

Being that some men are clueless to all you have to say, sometimes its a blessing. Some guys are clueless, even after practically flashing them, they still don’t getthat you are trying to flirt with them. The best advice I have been given when speaking to an individual or group of individuals has been to speak carefully my words and never lose eye contact. The women get swept off their feet with innumerable romantic whispers, promises and some times a lot of sweet nothings when men woo women. Women too, being incorrigible romantics, are carried away and start fantasizing that they have got the man of their dreams.

Then follows the usual ritual and the man proposes and the woman eagerly accepts. Wedding takes place, followed by a dream honeymoon and then the couple returns to their daily rigor. All is hunky dory for some days and then gradually, the euphoria lessens and the man slowly unveils his real self. He throws his things around expecting his wife to restore them to their places, expects laundered clothes all the time, wants breakfast to be ready by the time he leaves, expects wife to greet him when he returns, watches TV while sipping coffee, while the wifey dear is preparing dinner.

He has his dinner and goes to sleep blissfully unaware of what his wife wants. Do you want to know what men really want? They want a lover, friend, mother, sister, nurse, house keeper, adviser, all rolled into one in the form of a wife and I must say that is what makes them lovable! To my mind, what most men find attractive, more than anything else, is a sense of fun. You want a woman (or another man, if that’s your preference) who enjoys life and doesn’t get hung up on anxieties or gloomy scenarios. Who wants misery and anxiety? You will welcome an enthusiastic and optimistic guy who will make people laugh heartily.

Someone who cares more about pleasure than guilt will try new things for the sake of trying them. If you want to attract a man, show him that you’re not afraid to embrace the things you enjoy. You do not want to spend your time with someone who will not allow themselves to partake in all the greatness that is offered in their lives. This would make for a very poor life partner. I liked such women most who were willing to share a goofy joke,and be frivolous often.

How Single Women Can Pick Up More Men

Monday, June 29th, 2009 | Natural and Lasting Attraction | No Comments

Some people….well, most people think that it’s easy to seduce men. I disagree. I would argue that seduction involves an object that is otherwise unattainable. A husband cannot seduce his wife, for example, because she is already attached to him. Likewise, almost all the men where ever they are already attracted to the opposite sex at once. In order to change this attitude into seduction ladies have to exert only minimal effort. A simple ‘hi’ may do at times, while other men may requre a more sophisticated and calculated ‘hi there’ with a smile.

In any case, seducing a man is like offering candy to a starving baby…the interest is already there. If only the interest is already there between them a man can seduce another man. If the interest isn’t there, however, the task becomes near impossible. One of the best places that I have found to pick up married men is at a coffee shop. Coffee shops are a great place to people watch. One great thing about coffee shops are they are small so it is easier to be noticed. Anyone who used to visit coffee shop alone is more lovable than reading a book.

It always helps if you can find out a man’s likes and dislikes before you actually meet him. If you can catch a glimpse of what he is reading it is a great way to start up conversation. You can tell a lot about a man by observing the ways he treats other people. Is he nice to the person who is getting his coffee? Does he seem annoyed with others making noise around him? Does he talk on his phone the whole time he is there. Does he seem relaxed or comfortable. Does he notice you? A book with an interesting title is the key for a pleasant conversation.

Ensure that you do read the book, by doing if asked about it you can talk about it. Ensure to choose a book which represents you in a better way. Good luck ladies! Do dogs really understand more about human life than the humans themselves because of their keen powers of observation? Their reactions may be mysterious whatever the case, sometimes they save our lives. Sometimes the cues we give tip off our animals: Isn’t a day off great. Put on your comfy clothes, sleep in, let them know that they get to spend time with you all day long.

our dog will identify whether we are going out or alive in the house by watching the shoe position Repetition can sub-consciously alert us to certain events, such as treats being available when certain sounds are heard, or the ringing of the phone signaling dad needs picked up at the train station. And so on. Many dogs understand danger and will do everything to communicate or even solve the problem. Once a beagle did not stop howling and running up and down the stairway until the owner went upstairs: the kitten had knocked the hair dryer on the floor, the switch had turned on, and the thing was very, very hot.

Once a dog stood over its injured mother in the middle of a highway until human help rescued the older dog. Once a loyal pooch saved its owner from a mountain lion attack. The stories are oft told and profoundly touching. Another thing nearly every dog seems to get is how to become irresistible to a man. He comes in hot, sweaty, takes off his jacket and loosens his tie as he reaches for a gin and tonic. The Golden Retriever gets her tennis ball, follows him to the living room, spits the ball out on the floor and rises to put her paws around his neck.

Soon they are in the yard playing ball. Or he wakes up groaning and pulling the pillow over his head, but the Lab pushes his nose under the pillow, licks the guy’s whiskery face and soon man and dog are running their five mile loop in the crisp morning air. Or, he slams the car door, walks into the house without speaking to mom or dad, and flops on his bed in tears over the embarrassing break-up with his girl friend. The Border Collie mix they’ve had since the boy was eight jumps up on the bed and sprawls next to him with her head next to his — and she stays for as long as he does, even though he won’t let anyone else come into his room.

Or dad goes out to cut the lawn, but the big old mutt brings him the Frisbee, so dad comes in an hour later when it starts to rain and he hasn’t started the mower yet. Then there is grand dad, who is becoming very confused with early Alzheimer’s. But the two Dachshund mixes don’t care if he has forgotten their names, and they make sure he can’t disappear from sight without someone else knowing about it. How many stories need we tell? Clearly it is dogs who understand how to be irresistible to men!

Planning your Wedding Ceremony

Friday, June 26th, 2009 | Relationship Advice | No Comments

When preparing to get married, there are lists of things you have to get in order before the big day. Trying to find a Lexington wedding photographer can be difficult. Once you’ve found a wedding photographer Lexington KY has a lot of great location options. Finding a perfect location to take the pictures of the bridal party is very important.

Though a photographer is important, there are so many aspects that go into making a ceremony memorable. Having the perfect number of guests is really important for the ceremony and reception to go well. With a really large number of guests, it can be kind of overwhelming and you do not really get to spend any personal time with them. By sticking to a smaller guest list, you are able to actually see and visit with the people you love.

When planning the ceremony, you need to find a beautiful location that works for all weather. Though outside ceremonies are beautiful and romantic, they can be a bit impractical. If you decide to go with an outside ceremony, you need to make sure you have an option in case it is a rainy day. Having a tent of some sort is a simple rain plan, though it is not fool proof. You may want to talk to the site owners to see if there is a building of some sort you can use in case you do run into an issue with rain.

Destination marriage ceremonies also are very popular and very romantic. However, the problem with having the ceremony at a beautiful destination spot is that there is the potential for an increased cost and more stress with planning. Unless you are spending a lot of time prior to the big day at the location, you do not really get to monitor the preparations for the ceremony. You could potentially arrive with only hours before the ceremony to find all sorts of the arrangements out of sort. A potential issue with planning a ceremony at a remote location is that your guests may have problems making it to the location”. You need to consider a lot of other things when planning. One aspect that is important to plan early on is the food for the reception. With creating a menu for the reception, it is important to make sure there are options for your guests. Having a vegetarian option is very important in case you do have guests with dietary restrictions. If you do end up choosing to go with a destination marriage ceremony, an option for catering is to find a local restaurant to make local dishes for the reception.

Making your dreams become a reality is a lot of planning, but in the end will be a day that you will remember for the rest of your lives together. Remember that no matter what type of ceremony you decide to go with that it is an expression of your love for one another and a way to portray your love to all of the people in your life.